1. Decide that you want to solve the problems in your relationship. If
you aren’t fully committed to the idea of saving your marriage or love
relationship, then you won’t go far as a couple! Before you can even
hope to make your relationship happy, you need to consciously
decide that you want to build a better marriage. And, you need to accept that it takes time, energy, and effort to build and sustain a happy relationship.
2. Identify the source of the unhappiness, boredom, or frustration in your relationship. What is the underlying problem? Sit down and make a list of the things that are troublesome in your love relationship. Then, figure out what you can live with – because marriage is about acceptance and unconditional love – and what you can’t live with. Though couples counseling can help you determine the difference between the two, it’s not always necessary. That is, if you know the source of your unhappiness is, for example, boredom with life or meddling in-laws, then you can focus on fixing what’s wrong and enjoying what’s right.
3. Read books about building a happy marriage together. I’m reading 5 Simple Steps to Take Your Marriage from Good to Great
by marriage therapist Dr. Terri Orbuch. She offers practical, easy to
apply marriage tips that are incredibly effective! No matter what stage
your love relationship is at – even if you’re rebuilding trust after physical or emotional infidelity
– you’ll find her tips helpful. But, the key is to read the book as a
couple and talk about the marriage tips. To reconnect with your spouse,
you both need to be committed to saving your marriage.
4. Let go of the past. Are you holding on to old resentments or unfulfilled dreams of the way your marriage or life should be? Try to let go of those old ways of thinking or hoping. To solve problems in love relationships, look at yourself and your life in new ways as you move forward into a new chapter in your marriage. Focus on the great things that have happened with your family, home, career, and relationship. Savor your successes, and refocus on new dreams or goals for your relationship.
5. Consider a weekend marriage retreat. Many churches, nonprofit organizations, and counseling centers offer weekend marriage retreats. You can learn a surprising amount about your marriage and partner in a couple of days – and the intensive focus on your relationship can be as helpful as months of couples counseling.
6. Try online couples counseling. I often include Mort Fertel’s Marriage Fitness program in my marriage articles here on Quips and Tips for Love Relationships. Recently, I was thrilled to hear one of my friends describe how great his program is for couples – and she didn’t even know that I have his Marriage Fitness info here on my blog! Fertel is a marriage coach who doesn’t do traditional couples counseling;
If your relationship is really rocky, you might find The Magic of Making Up helpful.
Thanks To Laurie Pawlik-Kienlen
2. Identify the source of the unhappiness, boredom, or frustration in your relationship. What is the underlying problem? Sit down and make a list of the things that are troublesome in your love relationship. Then, figure out what you can live with – because marriage is about acceptance and unconditional love – and what you can’t live with. Though couples counseling can help you determine the difference between the two, it’s not always necessary. That is, if you know the source of your unhappiness is, for example, boredom with life or meddling in-laws, then you can focus on fixing what’s wrong and enjoying what’s right.
3. Read books about building a happy marriage together. I’m reading 5 Simple Steps to Take Your Marriage from Good to Great
by marriage therapist Dr. Terri Orbuch. She offers practical, easy to
apply marriage tips that are incredibly effective! No matter what stage
your love relationship is at – even if you’re rebuilding trust after physical or emotional infidelity
– you’ll find her tips helpful. But, the key is to read the book as a
couple and talk about the marriage tips. To reconnect with your spouse,
you both need to be committed to saving your marriage.4. Let go of the past. Are you holding on to old resentments or unfulfilled dreams of the way your marriage or life should be? Try to let go of those old ways of thinking or hoping. To solve problems in love relationships, look at yourself and your life in new ways as you move forward into a new chapter in your marriage. Focus on the great things that have happened with your family, home, career, and relationship. Savor your successes, and refocus on new dreams or goals for your relationship.
5. Consider a weekend marriage retreat. Many churches, nonprofit organizations, and counseling centers offer weekend marriage retreats. You can learn a surprising amount about your marriage and partner in a couple of days – and the intensive focus on your relationship can be as helpful as months of couples counseling.
6. Try online couples counseling. I often include Mort Fertel’s Marriage Fitness program in my marriage articles here on Quips and Tips for Love Relationships. Recently, I was thrilled to hear one of my friends describe how great his program is for couples – and she didn’t even know that I have his Marriage Fitness info here on my blog! Fertel is a marriage coach who doesn’t do traditional couples counseling;
If your relationship is really rocky, you might find The Magic of Making Up helpful.
Thanks To Laurie Pawlik-Kienlen
