AIDS

INTRODUCTION  

No other word engenders as much fear, revulsion, despair and utter helplessness as AIDS. It is, in fact, rewriting medical history as humankind`s deadliest scourge. With 40 million deaths forecast in this millennium, statistics tell their own sordid tale.

The first recorded sample of HIV was discovered in 1959 in a blood specimen obtained at Leopoldville (now Kinshasa) in the Belgian Congo. This was the first known death chalked up by AIDS. The virus is thought to have originally affected chimpanzees. The crossover from animals to humans may have occurred in the 1950s through an accident or a bite.

Intermittently, other theories of its origins have been advanced. One theory, put forward by Bette Korber, traces the disease to a single viral ancestor that could have emerged between 1910 and 1950. Through an analysis done at the Los Alamos National Lab in New Mexico, Korber contends that the pandemic may have come from one or more infected humans around 1930.

Another highly controversial—but plausible—theory is that of American philosopher, Louis Pascal, first spelt out in 1987. All the early AIDS cases originated in the Central African states of Congo, Rwanda or Burundi. This belt was subjected to trials of a live polio vaccine on 300,000 men, women and children..

Pascal argued that the vaccine, which was grown in cultures obtained from chopped up chimpanzee kidneys, may have carried this virus. Polio researcher Dr Albert Sabin had reported that such a batch was contaminated by an unknown virus. In fact, monkeys harbor SIV or simian immunodeficiency virus (SV-40 to be more specific), which is thought to be the ancestor of HIV..

The first cases of AIDS were reported in the United States in 1981, amongst male homosexuals in Los Angeles and New York. Within two decades, up to 50 million may have been infected globally, approximately 22 million have succumbed and nearly 15,000 new infections are said to occur daily..

What Is Aids & HIV
HIV has two major categories: HIV-1 and HIV-2. HIV-1, which currently has about 10 subtypes, is most common worldwide and the only form found in the US. HIV-2 is less virulent and though currently confined to West Africa—it`s spreading.

The Human Immunodeficiency Virus (HIV) basically provokes an infection, which destroys the body`s immune system. And AIDS or Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome is the advanced stage of this disease, when the immune system becomes irreparably damaged, engendering multiple infections and cancers. A person is considered HIV positive when s/he tests positive for any of the 26 diseases (Kaposi`s sarcoma, lymphoma, pulmonary tuberculosis, recurrent pneumonia within a 12-month period, wasting syndrome and other indicators) that can easily invade the body during our immune system`s nonfunctionality.

On invading the body, the virus specifically attacks T-cells. A core part of the human defence system, they mobilize other cells to seek and destroy contagious foreign elements besides leading the immune system`s fight against infections. T-cells are targeted because the AIDS virus parasitizes the CD4 molecules on their surface.

With a protective outer shell of proteins and glyco-proteins, the AIDS virus contains genetic information on the inside. Although substantially smaller than the host T-cells—the virus reproduces by sponging off the host`s cellular resources! Our body fights back by producing up to two billion new T-cells to replace the infected ones, stabilizing the T-cell count temporarily. Yet from day one, the T-cells fight a losing battle.

The genetic information of the AIDS virus, which is encoded as RNA (ribonucleic acid), needs to be reverse transcripted—which the intruder accomplishes with the help of the host cell itself! The now legible DNA is thereafter randomly transferred into the nucleus. All this is accomplished barely a dozen hours following the infection. By this time, the aggressor begins to substantially weaken the host cell, which eventually dies, eroding the immune system and making the body vulnerable to diseases.

Although HIV targets T-cells and other cells in the body, it thrives mainly in the lymph nodes—another important part of the immune system. Each lymph node has a netlike structure inside it that acts as a protective filter by trapping virus and infected T-cells. But as healthy T-cells move through contaminated lymph nodes, they are infected by HIV. Particularly during the early stage of the disease, lymph nodes contain more infected cells than the blood.

Symptoms
In the early stages, a mild flu and swollen glands are typical. But the symptoms are often unmistakeable when full-blown AIDS develops. Loss of appetite, weight loss, constant fever, prolonged fatigue, diarrhea, constipation, changing bowel patterns, swollen glands, chills coupled with excessive sweating, especially at nights, lesions in the mouth, sore throat, persistent cough, shortness of breath, tumours, skin rashes, headaches, memory lapses, swelling in the joints, pain in various parts of the body, vision problems and a regular feeling of lethargy and ill health make up the litany of symptoms.

With immune systems out of kilter, HIV-positive persons are susceptible to several types of cancer, particularly Kaposi`s sarcoma (KS), an uncommon form that occurs under the skin and in the mucus membranes of the eyes, nose and mouth. Affected persons have lesions that appear as dark-coloured raised blotches. Though the lesions are painless, once KS spreads to the lungs, lymph nodes and digestive tract, the victim experiences difficulty in breathing, gastrointestinal bleeding and painful swelling around the lymph nodes, especially in the legs.

Modes Of Transmission
HIV is transmitted primarily by sex (anal, vaginal or oral sex with an infected partner), by injections (sharing contaminated needles for drug use or accidental piercing with a contaminated needle), or from infected mother to child through pregnancy or breast-feeding.

Infected semen and vaginal fluids, infected blood and blood products lead to the transmission of HIV. Drug abuse with unsterilized needles is another high-risk activity. Unprotected sex with multiple partners is the primary cause of infection. During unprotected sex, the infected fluid could enter the bloodstream through a tiny cut or a sore. Anal penetration has a higher risk of transmission, which is why a high percentage of homosexuals develop the disease. Bleeding during sex also raises the chances of infection. Therefore unprotected sex during menstrual periods and anal intercourse are best avoided.

An infected mother can also transmit the virus to her baby before or during birth or through breast milk. Although traces of HIV have been detected in body fluids (saliva, urine, faeces and tears) there is no evidence that HIV spreads through these fluids. Nor is it water-borne, air-borne or transmitted through mosquitoes and other insects.

Some HIV-infected patients progress to AIDS quickly while others can remain healthy for 10 years or more. Between initial infection and full-blown disease, a middle phase called symptomatic HIV infection, or AIDS-related complex (ARC), occurs, prompting symptoms such as weight loss, diarrhea, and swollen lymph glands.

Scientists have recently discovered clues to why some patients develop AIDS quickly. In a study published last March in the journal Science, National Cancer Institute researchers found that inherited genes may set the clock for AIDS progression. Certain gene patterns tend to stave off AIDS, while others promote it. The researchers say the study may help lead to an AIDS-preventive vaccine or improved therapies against the virus.

Gender Differences in the Risk of HIV Infection
HIV risk factors among injection drug users (IDUs) differ markedly by gender, according to a 10-year study funded by the National Institute on Drug Abuse (NIDA). A recent study by researchers at the Johns Hopkins University reported that while drug-related risk behaviors and homosexual activity are the most important predictors of HIV seroconversion among males, factors consistent with high-risk heterosexual activities are the main predictors among females. The findings, reported in the May 28 (2001) issue of the Archives of Internal Medicine, provide insight into the relationship between gender and high-risk sexual behaviors in the development of HIV infection.

"Early studies of injection drug users suggested that most HIV infections were due primarily to sharing needles," said NIDA Director Alan I. Leshner, Ph.D. "This study adds to the body of evidence that supports the need for gender-specific interventions in the treatment of that group of drug users."

Between 1988 and 1998, a team of researchers, led by Dr. Steffanie Strathdee at the Johns Hopkins University Bloomberg School of Public Health, examined both drug related and sexual risk factors for HIV transmission in a study of more than 1,800 injecting drug users in Baltimore, Maryland. Study participants were aged 18 or older, did not have an AIDS defining illness at enrollment, and reported a history of illicit injection drug use within the previous 10 years. Through semiannual interviews, researchers collected data on drug use history, sociodemographics, and drug use and sexual behavior within the last 6 months. Blood samples were also obtained at each study visit. Researchers used commercial HIV and antibody ELISA to identify those participants who had become HIV positive since their last visit.

Dr. Strathdee and her colleagues found that the greatest predictor for HIV seroconversion among both male and female IDUs was high-risk sexual behavior. Study findings revealed that male injection drug users who reported recent homosexual activity were four times more likely to become infected with HIV.

Among females, indicators of high-risk heterosexual activity outweighed needle-sharing behaviors as independent predictors of HIV seroconversion. HIV incidence was more than two times higher among women who reported recently having sex with another injection drug user.

Another common predictor of HIV seroconversion observed by researchers among both male and female IDUs was younger age. Investigators found that IDUs who were aged 30 or younger at enrollment were more than twice as likely to seroconvert than those aged 40 or older.

"This is consistent with several reports which indicate that younger IDUs are more likely to engage in needle sharing and other behaviors that place them at higher risk of acquiring HIV and hepatitis B or C viruses," stated Dr. Strathdee.

Prevention
While AIDS is a high-risk disease it can be prevented if proper precautions are taken and greater awareness meted out to those who are ignorant of the virus and its repercussions on the human body. Here we have listed a few measures which can be adopted by everyone inorder to stave off the insidious entry of HIV.

• Prevention is still the best bet. Promiscuous sexual behavior can leave a person highly susceptible to contracting the virus. Where abstinence is not possible, always use latex condoms. The female condom can also help protect both partners. Use only water-based lubricants. Oil lubricants (such as Vaseline) might even tear latex condoms. Use spermicidal (birth control) foams and jellies in addition to condoms. By themselves, spermicides may not be effective in preventing HIV.

• Avoid alcohol or drugs during sex, you might lose control of your senses and engage in unsafe sex. Stick to safer sex practices at all times and avoid having multiple partners. Practice monogamy. If this is a tall order, serial relationships are a lesser evil than multiple ones

• High-risk sexual behavior should be avoided at all costs. These include: oral genital sex involving contact with semen or vaginal fluids, oral anal sex, vaginal sex without a condom, anal sex sans a condom (active or passive), fisting or manual anal intercourse, the sharing of sex toys, using saliva for lubrication and blood contact of any kind during performance. If unable to resist oral sex, use a dental dam. If a woman is infected, avoid sex during the menses as menstrual blood is infectious

• For transfusions, use disposable syringes and needles. Ensure you get blood that is screened and certified as HIV-free. Better still, get blood from close family members rather than professional donors whose medical antecedents are nebulous

• The presence of sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) increases the risk of contracting HIV from an infected partner. STDs could cause breaks in the skin of the vagina, penis or anus permitting the virus to enter your bloodstream. If you ever contract an STD of any kind, ensure you get prompt treatment.

• The CDC recommends that an HIV-positive woman should not breast-feed her baby. The infant should be given AZT for the first several weeks to substantially reduce the risk of infection.

Myths & Facts
Say `AIDS` and dime-a-dozen misconceptions abound. The chart topper is that AIDS is supposedly a disease of gay men and intravenous drug users. The facts are otherwise. No doubt in the early years many HIV-positive cases were reported amongst the Western gay community. In recent years, however, prevalence rates among gays have leveled off. Instead, heterosexual transmission has been forging ahead of all other modes of transmission.

The AIDS virus is NOT contracted through touching, hugging, kissing, massage, sharing toilet seats, drinking or eating from utensils used by an infected person or any other mode of casual contact. Nor does working, socialising and living with infected people cause the disease.

Repeated sexual contact without proper precautions with an infected person, using an infected syringe, exposure to infected blood or sexual fluids are ways through which the disease can be transmitted.

Donating blood also does not run the risk of disease contraction since needles used for such purposes are always sterile. Since the AIDS virus is unable to survive outside the human body beyond a short duration, dried blood is not infectious For this reason, mosquitoes are incapable of transmitting HIV as the virus cannot replicate itself in the intestine of insects.

Although medical personnel are potentially at risk from infection, this is minimal if protective gear such as gloves, masks and goggles are always used when handling potentially infected material.

The Elusive Cure
The large-scale infections and deaths have spurred a spate of worldwide efforts for a cure. In the US, however, AIDS cases are said to be dropping and new infections leveling off. Mortality from AIDS is also dropping.

In the developing countries, though, the cases continue to rise alarmingly. Globally, three million died in the year 2000, with 5.3 million newly infected people, 95 percent of whom might die.

Many scientists, doctors and researchers contend that AIDS is not a new disease, having been around much longer than people believe. Dr. Robert Willner—author of Deadly Deception: The Proof That Sex and HIV Absolutely Do Not Cause AIDS—asserts that HIV is not the cause of AIDS. He claims that nearly 500 hundred top scientists of the world have challenged the hypothesis of Robert Gallo—who patented the HIV test the day after the AIDS virus was discovered—that HIV is the precursor of AIDS.

Besides other telling facts, the dissenters want to know how one can explain HIV-free AIDS cases, of which there are said to be nearly 5,000 on record.

Dr. Frank Shallenberger, a licensed medical and homeopathic practitioner, says that statistics are only a correlation—not a result—that HIV is one cause of AIDS, citing the fact that some AIDS victims do not have HIV antibodies. Dr. Shallenberger considers AIDS a multifactorial disease that strikes when the immune system is down.

The search for a cure, also brings to light other interesting facets. African chimpanzees have been harboring the simian equivalent of the AIDS virus for centuries, according to detailed studies conducted by researches at the University of Alabama in Birmingham. Why don`t the chimps succumb to the virus?

Says Dr. Anthony Fauci from the National Institutes of Health: "There must be something about the chimp`s immune system or some host defense system that is doing a very good job of containing the virus. If we find that out we may be able to extrapolate to humans."

Chimpanzees being the closest living relatives of humans, their DNA differs from human DNA by less than two percent. Adds Dr. Fauci: "It`s entirely conceivable that the very small genetic differences between the chimp and the human will explain why the chimpanzee does not get sick and the human does."

It Was Love At First Sight, Soul Attraction At First Sight

The romantics want to say that it was love at first sight. However with some exceptions, it is generally attraction at first sight or infatuation at first sight. It is possible for love to grow between 2 people who spend time associating with each other, without actually seeing each other in person. You can get to know someone and experience feelings for them without seeing them first. So in that scenario, it is possible that it was love at first sight, and there may be other love at first sight possibilities.
There may be those who may claim that they were soul mates at first sight. Well, with God all things are possible, and Jesus said in Matthew 19:4-6; He answered them, "Haven’t you read that the one who made them at the beginning ‘made them male and female’ and said, ‘That is why a man will leave his father and mother and be united with his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore, what God has joined together, man must never separate." God is always working in our lives and He can bring two people together. But just because you are attracted to someone, does not mean that they are your love at first sight. And, even if God does bring two people together, it does not mean that they fell in love at first sight. God can bring two people together, but there is generally a relational growth period of some kind. So if a couple says that God brought them together, that is certainly quite believable.
Sometimes those romantic love at first sight wishes are hampered by attraction at first sight. Attraction can lead to heightened interest, excitement, and to emotional arousal. Sometimes the desires of men and women overtake their judgment abilities. Men and women are far too often looking for exterior physical looks and they miss the true inner beauty. Just because you find someone attractive does not mean that you have fallen in love with them. You may be mentally or emotionally aroused do to a physical attraction, however that does not mean that it was love at first sight. Often times men and women are in such a rush to find their soul mates, that they take the first thing that comes along, and they miss the person that God was trying to connect them with. For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh and the lust of the eyes and the boastful pride of life, is not from the Father, but is from the world. 1 John 2:16
There are times when men or women miss what God has for them because their expectations are too high or because they do not feel worthy for some reason. Just because someone does not appear to line up to be your perfect woman or make your perfect man list, does not mean that they are not perfect for you. God knows you better than you know yourself and he knows who would be the best match for you. Have you ever had someone tell you what their soul mate should be like? They were so finicky, so picky, that they would miss their best love at first sight opportunity because a guy was only 1 inch taller than them, or because a woman wore her hair up. Have you ever heard a woman say, he has to be like this, he must be like that, he must like to do this, he must like to do that? I do not think they have a drive thru where Barbie can make such a detailed creation of Ken, maybe they could do it with play doh though. Finding the right person for you, begins with you being the right person. Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain, But a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised. Proverbs 31:30
Sometimes people block out their best love at first sight opportunities because of previous experiences. I once listened to a story about an African American woman who had totally blocked out all African American men due to her past relationships, she had labeled them all unworthy because of her own pain. Too often people label others by race or culture and do not realize that the issue is within them. At first sight, they walk away from the person who may have been their intended soul mate without even getting to know them. How many times have you heard the slogan; you can’t read a book by its cover?
Our cultures and the societies we live in know far more about sex, than about love. Many people who say it was love at first sight, had sex that first night. It was sexual attraction at first sight, they let there hormones control them at first sight, they let their emotions think for them at first sight, and too many women give themselves away at first sight. A month later they are saying that it was love at first sight, when it reality it was lust at first sight. Too many people refer to sex as making love, when the sex is purely lust driven. After making the claim that it was love at first sight, months or years later, they have separated or divorced because it was never love to begin with. What your corrupt nature wants is contrary to what your spiritual nature wants, and what your spiritual nature wants is contrary to what your corrupt nature wants. They are opposed to each other. As a result, you don’t always do what you intend to do. Galatians 5:17
The longest journeys you will ever take will be between your own heart and your own mind. You experience feelings and those emotions are real, but they may not reflect reality. We all must learn how to control our emotions, and not allow our feelings to do our thinking for us, because our own emotions will deceive us. The heart is perverse above all things, and unsearchable, who can know it? Jeremiah 17:9
I hope that this love at first sight article has not totally popped your romantic thought bubbles. You can experience a divine connection at first sight, you could call that soul attraction at first sight if you wish. God does bring couples together, who establish relationships, and go on to get married; enjoying life long matrimony. When you first meet someone and have that love at first sight thought, first get to know them before assuming that your emotions know more than your mind does. Whoever trusts his own heart is a fool. Whoever walks in wisdom will survive. Proverbs 28:26

The Top Ten Reasons Why I Love You

What are the top 10 reasons why you love your wife, husband, spouse, boyfriend or girlfriend? Taking the time to give this careful consideration will enable you to have greater appreciation of your significant other. Something probably has already came into your mind, a significant reason why you love that special person in your life. Now, if your first thought was sexually related, then your first reason was a lust thought, not a love thought. Therefore your first reason would then be based on self indulgence, it's not outwardly loving, and therefore it is not a reason associated with love.

I love you because you tend to my needs, you do things that touch my heart, you look after me, you are there for me, you give me love in so many ways is a reaction to love that is shown to you. It is great when the love is flowing back and forth in this manner, (circulating), however to say that you love someone based upon what they do for you all the time is rather self centered. You should not always have to have a reason to love your boyfriend, girlfriend, or spouse. I love you because you love me is not an accurate reference point. The question is formulated for you to give the ten best reasons that you love someone, not the actual ways that they love you. I love you is an outward expression.

A connotation is what you must know in order to determine the reference of an expression. Here are some examples of a few reasons why you would love someone;  I love you because I consider you to be a blessing in and to my life. I value you as in integral part of my life, you are my consort, you are my friend, a companion, a confidant, and a partner. I love you because in my heart I desire to love you, I really want to, it brings me joy to love you. I love you because God brought us together through his infinite love for us. Our relationship is a catalyst for love, a place where love will grow through knowledge and understanding. The more I love you, the more we will connect together, the deeper our bonds will grow, we are better together. I love you because you need to be loved, I want to focus on your needs, not just mine.

The more you love someone, the more you will merge in unison. Love is more important than anything else. It is what ties everything completely together, (Colossians 3:14). In relationship, your lives will compliment each others in and through love. When you are intentionally focusing on loving someone you will be rewarded by their happiness. You will know that you are showing or expressing love to someone else when you are sacrificing your desires and your time, for their desires and their time. Love says, "I love you because I care about you." 

Take some time and deliberate this, look at it thoughtfully and cogitate it in deep thought. Ladies, what are the top ten reasons why you love your husband? Men, what are the best 10 reasons you have to love your spouse? In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. Ephesians 5:28

Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every 

Good Dating Questions, Pertinent Questions To Ask Your Dates

Asking your dates pertinent questions will help you to ascertain their character. You need to be able to define if your dates value systems and beliefs are in congruency. In healthy dating you are looking for agreeing qualities that are suitable and appropriate for a significant relationship foundation. You are not dating to find someone who is perfect, you are dating to find someone who is perfect for you. This brings up the question, "Is it ok to date more than one person at a time"? The answer to that is absolutely! However, keep in mind that the mannerisms in which you treat your dates will reflect your own interests. In other words, it is by your own actions that you will display your intentions, (whether or not your intentions are meaningful). If you are showing that you are available, then you are showing interest. But to the contrary, if you are seemingly not available very much, it might tell your potential dates that you are dating others.
Many people like to feel like you are focusing on them, and some who feel this way are still dating others, regardless of their own inhibition. What's good for the goose is good for the gander. This following advice is healthy guidance for all your relationships, treat those you are dating as you would like to be treated. You want kindness, sow kindness, you want respect, show respect. As you distinguish the questions that you would like to ask your dates, keep in mind that you don't want to emerge as a drill sergeant. The opportunities to ask your dates questions will present themselves at the right times, so remember to be yourself and have some fun. Below are some suggested questions to ask your dates, as well as some insights as to why those questions are being suggested. You might like to paraphrase these ten dating questions in other manners as per your needs.
1. Are you legally single?
This significant dating question is designed for your own protection, above all things guard your heart. You can not marry someone who is not single. You don't want to end up being someone's second fiddle, avoid that hurt. If someone is separated or going through a divorce they are not single, they are married. This question can open the door to other relational questions such as, have you been married? How long were you married? How long have you been single? Do you still communicate with your former spouse? Is that communication difficult? If so, why do you feel that is?
2. What do you like to do for fun, what do you enjoy?
Here you are looking for some commonalities in which you may share in. However, it is possible that the question may disclose some quality character traits or those that are deficient. For example, you may not find bar hopping and getting drunk as a fun idea. In fact, you may find that contrary to a healthy dating environment.
3. What's your family life like?
This question is formed for a multifaceted response capability where you may include other questions, based upon the answers that you receive. Your dates may come from various cultures, backgrounds, and upbringings, you may be able determine some core values that were instilled in their upbringing.
4. Do you feel that you are an honest person?
Most people believe that they are honest, but the true test of their honesty will come by their willingness to be real with you. If your dates pretend to have no blemishes or imperfections, then they are not being honest with themselves, (nobody is perfect, we all have shortcomings). To be honest with others, you must first be honest with yourself and with God.
5. What kind of relationship are you looking for?
The question regarding honesty above is suggested as a prerequisite to this question. You want to initiate truthfulness first, so that you may acquire a qualifying response to this question. Some people really don't know what they are looking for, they are just looking. If your date knows what is entailed in a significant relationship, they will be more likely to speak of those qualities. Vague responses such as,  "I am just looking to have some fun'", may suggest that your dates like to play around.
6. Are you a forgiving person?
People who have not forgiven hurts from the past carry those pains along with them into the present. Bitterness is contagious and it's poisonous. Someone who carries pains like this will bring those old pains into their new relationships and poison the new relationships with old unforgiven hurts. Most people will probably answer yes to this question, sometimes things are revealed to us in ways we did not expect. A person who loves overlooks the mistakes of others, they give allowances for imperfections, love forgives all offenses.
7. How do you know when you have forgiven?
The answer to this question may contradict their answer to the last question, if that is the case it's actually good for you, and it can be for them, (if you help them). If they do not know the answer then they may be carrying some pains from the past and right now you can help them realize it. So if they did not know the answer please supply it to them, it will help them to let the hurts go. You know that you have forgiven when you stop talking about the thing or person that you feel caused you the pain.
8. What do you feel the purpose of life is?
Chances are that you will receive a large array of answers to this question and some of them might be pretty good. Just know that we are all here to learn to love, if we miss that, then we have missed the most important aspect of life.
9. How important is your success and your productivity to you?
This is a pretty tough question, so if you use this one you may want to leave room for some mercy. Life is not about successes or how productive someone is.  A persons level of success does not define them, a person is defined by their essence. What will matter the most when life is done is how we loved the people we have had relationships with. Careers and materialism will not matter, but the love we shared will last forever.
10. Do you know God?
Again, it is suggested that the honesty question be posed prior to this one. To know God is to know love, for God is love, the source of love is God. How can one have, appreciate, or know how to express meaningful love unless they know the source of love? How can one believe in love and not believe in God? Beloved let us love one another, for love is from God; and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God. The one who does not love does not know God, for God is love. 1 John 4:7-8 (This question may be followed by questions like; What church do you go to?)
Within the answers to the above dating questions you will have a set of commonalities, relational abilities, values, and belief systems. This is initially the red light, green light area from which to move away from, or to proceed dating. It's up to you to determine a healthy foundation for a meaningful life long relationship, in your own best interests, be honest with yourself.

Best Marriage Advice Before Getting Married, Top 10 Pre-Wedding Tips

What is the best marriage advice for you before your wedding? Don't rush in, and don't wait too long are just a couple pre-wedding thoughts. The things to consider before getting married are multifaceted. Hopefully your wedding day mindset was developed well before you began dating, because with the best marriage advice you can prepare the wedding day platform in advance with permanency.
Pre-wedding tip number 1; is to take your time to develop a friendship with your potential partner. Some suggest that you wait at least four months before running down the wedding isle. It would be better that you extend that to at least six months, but for the purposes of best developing your relational foundation, wait for a year. You want your marriage to stay together, so take some time and form it properly in the beginning. Don't run off to Las Vegas, get drunk and get married at the wedding drive thru after knowing them for 2 months.
Pre-wedding tip number 2; You don't have to wait to have all 6 million of your ducks in line to get married. People are being taught through secular teachings that young adults should wait until they are in their 30's to get married, that is nonsense! Their line of thinking says that by then you will had time to enjoy your life, to have a career, a bank account, a house, a car, and a picket fence and that you will be more mature. Well you could have had a marriage partner all that time, had much to enjoy, and had the picket fence upgraded to a brick wall. Besides that, the marriage itself will make both of you grow up, through responsibility, and be more mature. Some women wait so long that they are no longer able to conceive! Life is all about relationship, if you sit around waiting for the perfect secular time, you will have missed out on the joys of a loving relationship. Understand that you do not need to have a house, a car, and lots of money to love someone. Love does not require things to be an enriching part of our lives. If your love of money supersedes your love for your spouse, then don't get married, the love of money is the root of all kinds of evil.
People who wait until they reach their 30's, before getting married, are far more likely to have more sexual health issues. They will either have had many sexual partners, risking a higher possibility of sexually transmitted diseases, (STD's). Or, in the case of many women, will have formed a belief that sex means nothing, (cause the guy is gone afterward), or struggle to achieve sexual contentment due to low Oxytocin levels, (from having multiple partners). Or, in the case of some men, their minds have been corrupted by porno to a point that they now stay home with imaginary lust figures who teach them that women are sexual objects, (not persons to love). Society teaches many men to fulfill their wants in 1, 2, 3, thanks I needed that, it's over now theories. Now, they both carry what they have inappropriately learned into a marriage and they wonder why it does not last.
I once knew a woman who wanted to base a relationship with me on her sexual satisfaction. She did not want to spend time getting to know one another, she wanted to see if I would satisfy her sexually. That was probably due to the fact that she had numerous previous partners and now had low levels of Ocytocin. I could not engage upon that kind of thinking, so nothing ever came of it. However years later I bumped into her, (by chance), and did converse with her some. I learned that she never had a child because her time had past by her, that was do to the fact that she was pursuing the wrong objectives.
Pre-wedding tip number 3; Seek out crucial relational insights, spend time with the founder of relationships. Put God first place in your lives, (1 John 4:7 Dear friends, let us continually love one another, because love comes from God.). Love comes from God! We are going to have a difficult time in relationships if we don't know the source of love. That means obtaining sound wisdom by going to a good Christian church, spending daily time in Gods word, the bible, praying, and listening. Seek out good structural relationship enhancing principles thru Godly wisdom.
Marriage advice tip number 4; Don't look to build a marriage relationship with people who are not equally yoked. Meaning that you should be with those who know God, (the founder of love and relationships). Do not be bound together with unbelievers; for what partnership have righteousness and lawlessness, or what fellowship has light with darkness? (2 Corinthians 6:14).
Pre-wedding tip number 5; Keep your sexual purity in tack until after the wedding. Too late for that now? Ok, so then ask God for forgiveness, forgive yourself, and start fresh on the right path, right now. Abstain from sexual relations, decide to control yourself and your hormones, and ask God to help you with that. It is better to course correct than it is to continue down a destructive pathway. Keep on running away from sexual immorality. Any other sin that a person commits is outside his body, but the person who sins sexually sins against his own body. (1 Corinthians 6:18).
Marriage advice tip number 6; Before you get married, before your wedding day, make a primary decision to stick together. Remember that in order to love, you need to have an otherness mindset, you need to be forgiving, you need to extend grace, and both of you must have decided before the marriage that divorce is not an option……..love is a choice, an action, a commitment, love always perseveres. But to the married I give instructions, not I, but the Lord, that the wife should not leave her husband (but if she does leave, she must remain unmarried, or else be reconciled to her husband), and that the husband should not divorce his wife. (1 Corinthians 7:10-11). "For I hate divorce," says the LORD, the God of Israel, "and him who covers his garment with wrong," says the LORD of hosts. "So take heed to your spirit, that you do not deal treacherously." (Malachi 2:16).
Marriage advice tip number 7; Look daily for what there is to appreciate about your spouse, if you are unable to find anything then you may have become too familiar, perhaps to a disposition harmed by pampering. When you see the things that there are to be appreciated, you will not be so stuck on seeing the imperfections and flaws that they have. Understand that you both have flaws, you will both make mistakes, you will both hurt each other, (because you are imperfect), and because of that you will both have to extend love by way of grace and forgiveness. You are going to need to be able to overlook things out of your love for each other. You are both going to find some things about each other that you do not like, so before getting married, commit yourselves to love each other in your marriage.
Marriage advice tip number 8; Love builds up, so always speak with loving intentions, speaking life into your spouse. As their partner you are there to support and encourage them, compliment them and speak over them with words of affirmation. You should not flatter them with falsehoods, but you can choose your words carefully and wisely in an edifying effort. Look to motivate them with positive uplifting words, never nit pik or attempt to motivate them by belittling them.
Marriage advice tip number 9; Don't expect your spouse to read your mind, learn to communicate at a level that they will clearly understand. Make every effort on your side to make certain that they understand what you are trying to communicate. Don't make the mistake of assuming that they know what you mean or what you want, clarify it. If you are not clear with your communication, don't tell them that they were not listening. Don't run around with hints and then get your expectations up so high that you become angry when your spouse does not meet those expectations.
Marriage advice tip number 10; Learn to be in control of yourself and your emotions, do not allow your emotions to control you. When your emotions are in control of you, you are far more likely to do stupid things and say harmful things that will damage your relationship. Anger is a emotional characteristic, you can be in control of yourself and your anger, if you are not it is because you choose not to be in control. Many times when people become angry, they become that way when they are looking for something for themselves. So finally, be aware that as humans we all struggle with selfishness and with pride, so be on lookout for your own selfish behavior and trade out your pride for the quality of humility.